Thursday, January 7, 2010

19 Degrees, was it really 19 Degrees???

I think that Coco and I set a new record for going out, doing our business, and getting back indoors. I know that I'm a Labrador Retriever and I'm supposed to LOVE the cold. And, yes, I've seen videos of Labs jumping into ice-ringed ponds to retrieve a duck that some jerk shot. WELL, NOT THIS LAB!!!!! If the old man should ever try duck hunting, he'd better be ready to jump in himself. I won't go in freezing water and as a mater of fact, I don't want to be near someone shooting a gun.

You complain, and you have an undercoat of fine hair that I don't have. Most every day we go out, I'm the first one back, scratching on the door to come in. Sometime later, I hear you"woof" and they let you in. I couldn't help notice that as I was scratching this morning, you were already howling to get in. How in the world do Labs in Newfoundland and Labrador survive? The only way I could survive is to lay beside the stove and pee in the house. Cold, ice, and snow should have no connection to me.

I've got a solution, but I don't know how many times it will work. We always wait for one of the folks to get up, feed us, and let us out. What if we get up a little earlier, and if it's very cold, we'll just have a little "accident" in the living room. I think a spot over in the corner by the front window would be a good spot and it would take longer for them to find it.

I know that you don't think of me as being the smart one of the two of us, but to me, that is totally ridiculous. First of all, when they find out, and they will, who do you think they'll blame? Molly, nope, she has gone. The pups, no, they are also gone. Therefore there's only you and me. Second what can they do? Do you remember that cage that they had for the puppies? Well, I remember it for the first day or two I was here. It's OK with the door open, but I wouldn't want to have to live here with the door latched all the time I'm inside.

You're right! You're right! You're right! I don't know what I was thinking. Even a Lab as smart as I can have a lapse now and then. I have another idea. Who says we have to run all the way to the back fence to do business? On these cold days I think I'll just run around to the side of the house. That's only 50 feet or so. If I hurry, I can probably run around the corner, go, and get back to the door before it closes.

Well, you do what you have to. I'm going to behave and settle for a lot of petting and scratching when I return. You make it sound so bleak, but when we return, we generally get a spot on Dad's bed. We get our heads scratched and our bellies rubbed, and then we're warm, and cozy. And, we don't have to fetch ducks or grouse or rabbits. We just lay around and eat and sleep. Ahhhh, the mere idea of all this is making me sleepy.